i wanted to blog about how they found the tenth planet in the solar system, or the people in the world that i admire, or even how silly i find plastic surgery.
but i am not going to.

my dad just marked the end of his short two day trip to singapore by leaving in a cab, minutes before I started typing this. His last words?
"Remember what I said, no roaming around at night....you don't have undue freedom"
a topic he never brought up in the course of his entire stay here until now.
Good grief. How to take someone as caustic about terrorism as him, seriously? Who doesn't understand the importance of not even harbouring prejudice in thought or word against anyone?
I grew up hero-worshipping my Dad, mostly because I never saw him I guess, with all the travelling that he did. He has qualities I like to say I hope I inherited.
Somehow age is not doing justice to our relationship. Neither is time filling up the ever-growing gulf between us.
I can stop fantasizing that my dad's like Atticus Finch.
not that I don't love him or anything.

busy discovering music on the eve of school opening...
downloading, transferring, emailing mp3s.
interpol, the fall, jeff buckley and hope to have more
because there is no joy like discovering that
you have a friend who has the music you so need.
all the music in the world, just to drown out the noise in my head
slow down my heart
and keep me sedate.

The newest addition to the blog...photos!!

Everybody Hurts - REM
When the day is long and the night, the night is yours alone,
When you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on
Don't let yourself go, 'cause everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong. Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone, (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go, (hold on)
When you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on

'Cause everybody hurts. Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts. Don't throw your hand. Oh, no. Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life, the days and nights are long,
When you think you've had too much of this life to hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes,
Everybody cries. And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes. So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts. You are not alone
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i know it's a bit strange i posted up the lyrics of this song and all but it's an ode to all the friends i have lost and whatnot. feeling a bit sentimental about it (must be the PMS talking i swear!) but yeah am still aware that life does indeed go on. it's a fine line, this idea of caring and being proactive about it and pushing the other person over the edge. i have been described as a very intense person to be with, and so i just lose control of that fact that sometimes i really dont have the right to emotionally stress someone out, even if i do it out of ignorance.
it feels like a flaw to be so fundamentally me. having looked at some of what describes me ( I am an INFP Jung type, and a 6 on Enneagrams), i don't seem to be in a zone where i am dwelling on my strengths. the fine line of being compassionate and being overtly curious. the fine line of being a stranger and a friend.
the fine line between just superficially normal and deeply insane.
Heh, i should get better, less distressing things to blog about.